A step closer

Yep, i'm finally done with prelims! Finally have time to blog and relax. These two weeks had been hectic. Once I got home, the only thing I should (or must) do was to study. Right now, i feel a big burden has lifted out of my back and i feel so relaxed! haha, but that doesn't mean i become complacent. F&N prelim today was shitty. Was so tired after teacher's day rehearsal yesterday (we rehearsed for 2 times, ended at 6pm) that i literally could not register any information into my head :(

Last sunday i went to collect my jj concert tickets! i was OVER THE MOON HAHAHA COZ I'M SO EXCITED HAHAAH ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL and it comes with a big poster HAHAHAA SO HAPPY

My concert ticket!

There, I'll be seating at PC1, what a good seat haha!! I bought my tickets from the fan club and seats when chose randomly!
Haha and right after i took the tickets i went striaght home coz i had to study for prelims :(

And prelims were bullshittttt. Almost could not finish my history paper, did not manage to finish amath paper 1, science paper 1 full of mistakes. zzzz. Had a full dress rehearsal for teacher's day concert all the way till 6pm. First rehearsal was alright, did not have mistakes just that i lack interaction with the audience. and i was shocked to see jiajun and co. at the glass door, which made me x1000 anxious because then more people were watching! but it went well. but the 2nd rehearsal was like shit because i totally went out of tune during the falsetto. the reason was that i tried to do interaction with the 'fans' and i felt really awkward and uncomfortable! hahaahah and i went home feeling super super worried that i'll repeat the same mistake again in the actual performance :( (instead of focusing on studying fnn)

And then today. This morning had fnn prelim, damn hard zzzzzz. plus i didnt study much coz i was too tired last night to continue :( yeaaa after that then i got changed and went to the music to wait for my turnnnn. I was so nervous in the music room and did innumerable amount of practices, esp on the falsetto. And then my name was called. It was my turn to get ready at backstage.
That was it. My time to shine, to gain recognition, to move forward to my dreams. The call scared me. Was I well prepared? Was I ready to perform? What if I make mistakes? What if no one cheers for me? What if, what if, what if. These thoughts went through my mind as if it was a cancerous tumor. I'm serious. I arrived at backstage, Aishah was performing. Mr Thong and Ms Seah were at backstage with me. They encouraged and chilled me down haha really thankful! Minqi also gave me hug haha aw such a sweet girl! Everyone in the backstage gave me support. I heard many 'all the best', 'jiayou', 'you can do it'. I was really thankful for people who gave support, really.
Then it was my turn. So so nervous I took deep breaths to calm myself down, it was my first time performing! Then during the singing I realized I could not produce falsetto! Then I improvised and use my real voice instead and I was a little unstable in the reaching of the real voice :( but I was really glad I did not make major mistakes in the midst of the performance! And yes, I'm a step nearer to my dreams! *screams*

Ok the hilarious thing about this is that I'm introduced as Rachel Lovato hahaha! And I have 5 awards idk their names hahaha! So weird and awkward! Okay I think my speech will go something like: "I want to thank my family, my friends, my fans and the person whom I love the most"

HAHAHHA LIKE VERY DRAMATIC AND MUSHY RIGHT OK I WAS JUST JOKING :P but if one day I really become a singer!!! hmmm AHHAHH wah seriously i hope i'm not dreaming, i hope this can become something real in the future man!!!



Okkkk enuf said about the performance and prelims. Yup, prelims are finally over! I'm only left with science practical. This is the last exam I'll taking in the school! The thought of graduating into a new school sometimes scares me.. what if i'm eventually not able to cope or just not able to blend in? I've been dying to graduate because i've been in this school for 5 years, and i'm learning the same thing over and being tested on the same thing as last year. It's getting tiring and boring so i wanna just graduate and learn new things, i don't want to be stuck here learning the same things. UGHH I CAN'T WAIT TO GRADUATE, BUT I'M AFRAID OF NEW ENVIRONMENT!

I'm so sososososo happy and relaxed right now because holiday starts tomorrow and exams has just ended. furthermore, IT'S JJ'S AUTOGRAPH SESSION TOMORROWWWW CAN I SCREAM NOW NO IT'S 11:11PM. HAHAHHA. and i heard him on air just now during tuition :P sorry yaqi i neglected you coz radio was more important to me then. HAHAHAHA ok i'm pumped up for tomorrow's session! have been watiing for sooo long and it's finally tomorrow! yeah!

OKKK GUDBAIII EVERYBADI I HOPE WE CAN ALL HAVE A GREAT SEP HOLIDAY COZ LIFE HAS BEEN STRESSFUL LETS HAVE FUN AND STRESS AGAIN AFTER HOLIDAYS HAHAHAAH :D I'M SO HAPPY NOW COZ I SAW ZH JUST NOW AND I'M SEEING JJ LIN TOMORROW HAHAAH